5 Things You Need to Know About Body Checking + Why We Need to Stop
LISTEN: APPLE PODCASTS | SPOTIFY | STITCHER
You know when you’re walking down the street and you have to see what your reflection looks like in the window? And how every time you pass a mirror you have to look at your body? And how you have to step on the scale every single morning and every single night to see how much you weigh? And how you constantly have to pinch your fat, or feel your hips or your arms or your thighs? Or how you always have to ask others “do I look fat?”.
ALL of those things are body checking! And let me tell you sister, your obsession with checking your body is holding you back from loving your body. That's why in this episode of Embrace Your Real, I want to bring you some REAL TALK on why it's holding you back and how to stop doing it ASAP.
If you loved this episode, I know you’ll also love…
Episode 126: 8 Numbers that Don’t Matter and Never Did
Sign up for my 4-Week Honor Your Body Challenge!
TRANSCRIPT:
Hey there, beautiful human. You're listening to Embrace Your Real with me, Julie Ledbetter, a podcast where I empower you to just be you. With each episode, I dish you a dose of real talk and actionable advice for building your confidence, honoring your body, and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned if you're ready to embrace your real. Let's get in, let's go.
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Embrace Your Real podcast. I am so excited that you are here spending some time with me today. Wherever you are tuning in, just know that you tuning in here is allowing you to become the best possible version of yourself so that you can show up to those who you love and the things that you love in this life in your best capacity. Today we're talking about five things that you need to know about body checking and why we need to stop. You might know what body checking is, or maybe you're like, "What the heck is body checking? In this episode, I'm going to be sharing about what it is and why we have a tendency to body check, and the toxic cycle that body checking can create, how it can hold us back from embracing our real, and how we can stop doing it.
But before I dive in today's episode, I had to share this super sweet review that comes from Anna Lee Dicky. She says, "Just what I needed, Julie. I cannot thank you enough for creating this podcast. It truly lifts me up. I discovered this podcast at the beginning of a new season of my life. As a mom of three under three..." Wow, you have your hands full. "Loving myself and my body has taken on a whole new meaning. This podcast reinforces the idea of caring for the body you have in the healthiest way to truly feel your best. After years of struggling with a body image disorder, I finally love and appreciate my body and everything it's given me. I feel more confident and beautiful at 31 than I did in my 20s. Thank you, Julie, for everything you do. I look forward to tuning in each week for that daily dose of real talk. XO, Anna."
Oh my goodness. Thank you so much. This is why I do what I do, because every single one of you listening, we are all in different seasons of our life. Maybe some days we have really good body image days and other days we're really struggling. But I think just reminding ourselves that we're not alone allows us the opportunity to continue pushing forward, continue pushing forward in the idea that we are here on this earth to show up as our best possible version. And that also includes showing up in our body as our best possible version, with the best possible self-talk that we can each day. And of course, we're human. And of course, that's not always going to be the case, but just knowing that there's a community of women all over the world that's committed to doing that, I want to remind that you are not alone in that pursuit and that you are never too far away.
You might feel like you had a bad week, a bad month or heck even a bad year, but I'm telling you that any day, you can choose to start thinking differently. You can choose to start taking different actions. It just takes you showing up for yourself and you allowing yourself to grow and committing yourself to pursuing that version. The healthiest version of what it looks like in your season of life.
Okay, let's dive into what body checking is. I'm going to kind of, like I shared, give you five things that you need to know about body checking.
First things first, what is body checking? You know when you're walking down the street and you have to see what the reflection looks like in the window? Or every time you pass a mirror, you look at your body? Or you have to step on a scale every morning and every night? Or how you're constantly pinching fat or feeling your hips or your arms or your thighs? Or how you always have to ask others, "Do I look fat?" For that reinforcement and always looking for that reassurance about your body. All of those things are considered to be body checking. So why do we body check?
Well, there's many reasons that we do it, but I believe the most common reason is because we think that our body validates us. And in order to be validated, we need to constantly be checking our body. I believe that we also body check because we want our body to look a certain way and we want it to be that way overnight. That is a human instinct. So we're constantly checking to see if any changes were made. And lastly, I think we have a tendency to body check when we're working towards changing our body. If we're nourishing our body with what it needs or honoring our body with movement, we as humans expect to see results ASAP. So we're constantly checking our body to see if it's changed.
Another reason why I think we check our body is just merely based out of habit. We maybe started it way back when we were a girl in high school or middle school. And ever since then, it's been a habit. And it's been something that you almost do subconsciously. You are not even recognizing that you're doing it until you start to take the steps to recognize like, "Oh my gosh, I am doing this. And as you say that, oh yes, I do do that." And just recognizing that it is something so deeply ingrained in you, that has been a habit for maybe a decade plus of your life. But I have to tell you that doing all of this is like watching water boil. It's discouraging, because remember that results don't happen overnight. And it can oftentimes make you feel like you're not making results, especially when you're constantly fixated on it. But essentially, what we're thinking subconsciously is when we're checking our body, we are more in control of what's going on with our body.
So why does this body checking create a toxic cycle? Okay, does something like this sound familiar? You have a negative thought about your body. For example, I feel fat today. This leads you to follow through on your body checking behavior. Maybe that's weighing yourself, feeling fat, or checking your body in the mirror, which can lead to one of two things. Number one, it gives you temporary relief because here's the thing. I feel fat stems from something so much greater. So your body checking is only covering up the problem. It's not actually alleviating the issue. Or two, it leads you to making you feel worse about your body. And the more that you check your body, the more you strengthen your thought of, "I feel fat," and eventually that turns into, "I am fat." And all of this leads you to stressing and obsessing more about your body and the cycle will just repeat itself.
So why does body checking hold us back from embracing our real?
As I said, when we're constantly body checking for most of us, we're constantly reinforcing our negative belief systems around our body. So every time we step on the scale, every time we look in the mirror, every time we pinch our fat, every time we catch a glimpse of our reflection, we're reinforcing our belief that our body is not what it should be. It's a constant reminder that our body isn't good enough and this needs to stop. The more we reinforce our belief that our worth is placed with what our body looks like or the size of our body. If you find comfort in feeling your flat stomach or find comfort in seeing how little you weigh, you're validating yourself based on your outward appearance. And this, my girl, can be very, very dangerous territory. Our body is always changing. Our self-worth should never be placed in it. So no matter what our body looks like, we know that we are always worthy.
The big question now is how do we break the cycle of body checking?
Well, first, we have to be aware of it. Most of us, like I said, do this subconsciously and we have no idea that it's even happening. Awareness is the first step to overcoming any obstacle or any addiction. We can't overcome it if we don't realize that we're doing it. So I need you to start paying attention. I need you to catch yourself in the moment. When you do become aware of it, ask yourself why? "Why did I feel the need to step on the scale? Why did I feel the need to touch my belly fat? Why did I feel the need to look at my reflection in the window? Why do I feel the need to constantly check my body?" Am guessing if you look at all of those things, you won't have a substantial answer.
Once you get to a place where you're completely aware of what you're doing, when you have the urge to body check, ask yourself, "Is this necessary?" Because is it necessary to always be checking your body? No, it's not. When you go step on a scale, ask yourself, "Do I need to do that?" When you go to touch your stomach, ask yourself, "Do I need to do this?" The more you ask yourself, if you need to do it, the more you'll realize you actually don't, which will lead you to realize that none of that serves you whatsoever.
So I need to ask you, are you committed to breaking the habit of body checking? Let's do it. Let's break this habit together. Let's get one step closer to embracing our real. And I know that it's really hard. I know that it's not going to come overnight, but I can tell you just like I had mentioned before, the more that you become aware of it, the more that you become in tune with your body, the more you'll be able to actually remind yourself, "None of this matters. None of this is serving me and none of this is actually taking me closer towards my goals. If anything, it's derailing me because it's distracting me from my day to day."
And for those of you have little ones around you, whether that's your own or your niece or nephew or whoever it is, remember that your actions, your actions speak so much louder than words. You could tell your daughter, or you could tell your niece that, "You're so beautiful. Oh my gosh, don't ever think anything less of yourself." But if they constantly see you doing something opposite of that, just remember that your actions can speak so much louder than your words. So I need you to watch your actions and I need you to start taking the steps that you need to take to detach yourself from body checking.
If you have somebody in your life that you feel like would benefit from this episode, I just ask that you share it out with them. You can screenshot this, post it up on your story. You can copy the link, send it to them in a text message. Either way, be sure to tag me so I can see it and I can connect with you.
If you loved this episode, I know you will also love Episode 126:8 Numbers that Don’t Matter and Never Did. I think once you realize that these eight numbers don't matter, it will greatly help you break free from the need to body check. You can easily tune into the episode by clicking the link in the show notes below. Again, that's Episode 126.
If you're ready to start honoring your body and break the toxic cycle that you might be having physically or mentally, I know that it can be hard to keep up with your health and fitness goals. I've been there, and that's why I created the Honor Your Body challenge, which is a four-week challenge that will help you get back on track with your health and fitness goals. It is designed to teach you the specific tools that you need to honor your body with movement, mindset, and macros. If you're listening to this on May 17th, 2021, today is the last day to sign up for the spring 2021 challenge. You can do so by going to www.honoryourbodychallenge.com. If you're tuning into this after May 21st, 2021, I want to encourage you to read up about the Honor Your Body challenge. You can still go to that website and sign up so that you'll be the first to know when any future challenges open.
Thank you so much for tuning in, and I will talk to you guys in the next episode.
All right, sister, that's all I got for you today, but I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you're not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so, @juliealedbetter. Yes, it's with an A in the middle, for that daily post-workout real talk, healthy tips and tricks and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing, be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode.
Thank you so much for joining me. It means the absolute world. And I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface. So go out there and embrace your real because you're worth it.