7 Things I Learned From Building More Muscle
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I used to have an obsession with being skinny no matter what it took. I would go to the extremes to become skinnier and skinner – sacrificing my health, my happiness, my relationships, experiences, all the things.
Thankfully, I met my husband, then boyfriend, who woke me up to what I was doing and how I was living. He showed me that in fact I DON’T need to be skinnier and I DON’T need to sacrifice all the above. Although, I’ll be honest, breaking my toxic habits and breaking free from my belief that I needed to be skinnier was HARD. I cannot explain to you just how hard it was. It was a long journey going from obsessing about being skinnier to properly nourishing my body, to honoring my body, and eventually to building muscle.
On my journey to learning to love the muscle I built, I came out with so many lessons learned. And in this episode of Embrace Your Real, I share 7 of them with you in hopes of making your journey a bit smoother and a bit more enjoyable, and hopefully help you get to the other side much quicker.
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TRANSCRIPT:
Hey there, beautiful human. You're listening to Embrace Your Real with me, Julie Ledbetter, a podcast where I empower you to just be you. With each episode, I dish you a dose of real talk and actionable advice for building your confidence, honoring your body, and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned if you're ready to Embrace Your Real. Let's get it, let's go.
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Embrace Your Real podcast. I am so incredibly grateful that you are here spending some time with me today. I am so excited about today's episode because we're talking all about seven things that I learned from building more muscle. I don't know if you know my story, but I used to have an obsession with being skinny, no matter what. And when I say no matter what, this is a complete understatement because I would go to absolute extremes to become skinnier and skinnier. I completely sacrificed my health, my happiness, my relationships, my experiences, and all of the things just to be skinnier. This is how obsessed I was. Nothing else in life at that moment mattered except for me getting smaller. It was my number one priority. It was everything that my thoughts were consumed by.
But thankfully I met my husband who at the time was my boyfriend, and he really woke me up to recognizing the damage that I was doing. He showed me that in fact, I didn't need to be skinnier and I don't need to sacrifice all of those things. But I'll be honest, breaking those toxic habits and breaking free from the belief that I thought I needed to be skinnier was hard. I can't explain to you just how hard it was. It took a long journey from obsessing about being skinnier to properly nourishing my body, to honoring my body and eventually building muscle. Muscle weighs more than fat, so building muscle was extremely hard for me at first because the number on the scale was rising. I also had zero muscle when I started, so building lean muscle mass meant that my clothes started to fit differently as well.
And when I went from having zero curves to having curves as women should, my body changed drastically. It was completely different. And I'll be honest, it was extremely hard for me to navigate that period of my life. I didn't recognize my body. It felt foreign to me. And it took a long time to adjust to learn to love it. But on this journey of learning to love the muscle that I built, I believe that I came out with so many lessons that I've learned. And so in this episode of Embrace Your Real, I want to share seven of them in hopes of making your journey a bit more smoother or more enjoyable and hopefully helping you get to the other side much quicker.
Before I do, I have to share this super sweet review. I love this one from hwtackett. She says, "The podcast I never knew I needed. In April, my husband and I found out that we lost our baby girl at 10.5 weeks due to Turner Syndrome. I have put on some emotional weight and fell into a state of depression ever since then. I stumbled upon this podcast and it has completely changed my life. Julie is such an amazing human. She has taught me to love my body and be confident, but has also empowered me to change what I don't like. Her tips and tricks are realistic and easy to apply to your own life. I look forward to new episodes every week. Thanks for being you, Julie. And thank you for this wonderful podcast."
First of all, I just want to say I'm so sorry that you lost your baby girl. I am praying for you and praying for peace and comfort during this time. And I just wanted to say I'm so proud of you for being empowered to change what you don't like in your life. I am so incredibly proud. That takes a lot of courage and it takes a lot of vulnerability to look at ourselves honestly and ask ourselves, what are the things that I do not like right now in this moment and how can I change them? So thank you so much for your vulnerability, your courage. I appreciate your review more than you know. And I just want to say a huge heartfelt thank you to every single one of you guys who leave a review.
They truly mean the absolute world to me. You guys are the reason why we are 150 episodes in now. So, thank you. If you have any Apple device, an iPad, an iPhone, you can actually download the Apple Podcasts app for free. And then when you get into that app, you can type in Embrace Your Real, and it will pop up. Be sure to subscribe. And if you can rate and review, it takes less than 30 seconds, but it helps the podcast out more than you know, reach more women of truly inspiring, encouraging, and empowering them to embrace their real. Okay. So, let's dive into the seven things that I've learned about building more muscle.
Number one, I have learned to respect my curves because they are beautiful. Now for years, you guys, I worked against my body. I did whatever I could do to get rid of my curves. I hated them so much. But once I started putting on more muscle, I started seeing curves on my body for the first time ever. And once I saw them, I started to actually embrace and love them and see them for what they are, which is beautiful. I realized that my body is meant to have curves. And guess what? Your body is also meant to have curves because as women, we are meant to have curves.
I'll be honest, most men love curves too. It's only us women that think we shouldn't have them, but we are literally designed to be curvy. So typically when we lose those curves, that also means that we might be losing our health. At the end of the day, we have nothing if we don't have our health. So I want you and I now do, I look at my curves as a sign of health, a sign of happiness, and a sign that I'm finally living my life to the fullest. And I am beyond thankful that they have given me all of that.
Number two, I learned confidence brings more opportunities. So, what does this have to do with muscle? Well, building more muscle actually made me feel more capable and more confident in my abilities and myself. I never in a million years thought that building more muscle would bring me confidence, but it has and it did. I went from being timid and shy to being able to light up a room with my confidence when I made a conscious effort. My muscle didn't just make me feel my strongest self in my workouts, but it carried throughout my day in every interaction that I had. And as a result, it allowed me more opportunities in life simply because I started putting myself out there more. I wasn't too shy to connect with others. I was excited to ask questions. I was eager to be vulnerable. All of which opened me up to this new world and a new world of amazing opportunities.
Number three, I learned to let go of any old clothes that didn't serve me or the body that I was building. Sister, I'm here to tell you that holding onto old clothes is seriously one of the most detrimental things that you could do when trying to embrace and love your body. When you hold onto them, you're preventing yourself from truly loving your body for what it is in that moment. So as long as those clothes are sitting in the closet, you're constantly going to be convincing your body that it's not what you want it to be right now or what it should be right now.
And most often these clothes were meant for a different season of life. We don't need to fit in them ever again. If this is actually something that you really struggle with, I want to encourage you to download and tune in to episode nine, What to Do When Your Clothes Don't Fit. I really go into a deep dive into the steps that you should take if you are struggling with this, because I know this was one of the biggest struggles that I had on my journey. I will go ahead and link that in the show notes so that you can easily go listen after this episode.
Number four, I learned that my body needs to be appreciated. You guys, when I stopped fighting my body to be as skinny as possible and instead shifted my focus to building my body as strong as it could be, a light bulb went off in my head. I was finally able to notice everything my body does for me. And I was finally able to be thankful for everything my body does for me. If you think about it, it's seriously insane. My body has carried me through a 100% of my worst days, no matter how terrible I treated it. So instead of fighting my body, I realized it was my obligation to appreciate it for all that it is and all that it does for me daily. That appreciation helped me more than anything to develop a healthier relationship with building more muscle.
Number five, I learned that weight cannot measure happiness. As I said earlier, muscle weighs more than fat. So when you build more muscle, you're likely going to gain weight. This is hard, especially for those of us who obsess over how much we weigh. For years when I was chasing skinny, I thought that X, Y, and Z weight was going to make me happy. But anytime I would reach that new low goal weight, I would still not feel satisfied. When I started to gain weight along with muscle, which I have now gained over 40 plus pounds, I realized how much better I feel. And in that moment, it all clicked for me. I realized that there was no amount of weight that I could lose that would make me happy.
There was no point that I would get to that I would be able to let out a deep breath and say, okay, I'm happy now. That just wasn't going to happen because I was always thinking that I needed more to lose. It was a never ending cycle that led me to an experience of never ending happiness. And I actually realized that weighing 5, 10, 15, 20, 30, even 40 pounds heavier actually made me happier. The "extra weight," which side note, it wasn't even extra weight. It was the weight that my body was naturally meant to be, was so worth the happiness that it brought me. Now, I would rather weigh more and have more happiness than weigh less and experience less happiness. It seems like a simple realization, but it took me so long to learn.
Number six, I learned that I'm not supposed to fit my clothes. My clothes are supposed to fit me. I literally spent a decade. Yes, a decade of my life crying in dressing rooms, forcing my body to try to fit certain clothes or just to try to fit a certain size. Instead of buying the size that actually fit, I tried to make my body smaller to fit the size. Isn't that backwards thinking? Because newsflash, there are different sizes on the shelf so that you can easily go grab a different size that actually fits instead of starving and punishing your body to fit into a certain size.
And another newsflash, when you no longer fit into your old clothes that you own, it's not your body's fault. Your body is not the problem. The problem is that you believe you don't fit your clothes and you are avoiding buying new clothes that fit you because again, clothes are meant to fit you, not the other way around. If there is one thing that you could take away from this episode, I really want you to remember that when you find clothes that fit and flatter your body, it truly changes everything. Again, remember that you are not supposed to fit your clothes. Your clothes are supposed to fit you.
Number seven, I learned that I needed to stop thinking that what I have now is the best that I will ever have. This mindset of fighting to be as skinny as possible was all I ever knew. And I believed it to be the best that I would ever have, which held me back for years. Sure, the unknown can be scary, and in this case building muscle. But if I wouldn't have taken the leap of faith to build more muscle, I would have never been able to experience all that I have in this body that I have today. I would never been able to experience all that I have in this body today. And I can tell you that finally feeling at peace in your body is a feeling that far surpasses anything I previously thought was the best that I had ever have.
So, there you have it. Those are the seven things that I have learned from building more muscle. Let me do a quick recap for you. Number one, I learned to respect my curves because they are beautiful. Number two, I learned that confidence brings more opportunities. Number three, I learned to let go of any old clothes that are not serving the body that I was building. Number four, I learned that my body needs to be appreciated. Number five, I learned that weight cannot measure happiness. Number six, I learned that I'm not supposed to fit my clothes. My clothes are supposed to fit me. And number seven, I learned that I need to stop thinking what I have now is the best I'll ever have, because that will prevent you from reaching for any new goals in the future and believing that the best is yet to come. So, there you have it. Those are the seven things that I learned from building more muscle.
Again, be sure to check out episode nine, What to Do When Your Clothes Don't Fit. I love connecting with you guys. And I love hearing your aha moments from the episode. So be sure to screenshot this, post it up on your Instagram story, your Facebook, your social media. Be sure to tag me, Julie Ledbetter, tag Embrace Your Real account. I would love to hear anything that you got from this message that you want to take into your life this week starting today. So, be sure to do that. Also, if you have a girl friend, a friend, a coworker, or someone in your life that you feel like would really benefit from this episode, I just ask that you share it out with them.
You can copy the link. You can send it to them in a text message. That really truly helps spread the message of Embrace Your Real, because after all, we are not in competition with one another. If anything, we truly are designed to live in connection with one another. And by just simply sending them something like this podcast that will encourage them, maybe empower them or provoke some new thoughts, that is ultimately what we are here to do. So, thank you in advance for doing that. I love you guys so much. And I'll talk to you in the next episode.
All right. Sister, that's all I got for you today, but I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you're not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so, juliealedbetter, yes, it's with an "a" in the middle, for that daily post-workout real talk, healthy tips and tricks, and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing, be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode. Thank you so much for joining me. It means the absolute world. And I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface, so go out there and Embrace Your Real because you're worth it.