3 Things You Need If You've Been Neglecting Yourself
LISTEN: APPLE PODCASTS | SPOTIFY | STITCHER
Do you often find yourself at the bottom of your priority list, constantly putting others' needs ahead of your own? In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it's easy to neglect your well-being. This episode is for every woman who feels overwhelmed and wants to reclaim her time and energy.
Join me as we explore how to shift this mindset and start prioritizing our own well-being. We'll discuss three critical steps to help you stop neglecting yourself and start embracing self-care, setting boundaries, and practicing self-acceptance daily.
What I discuss:
Make Self-Care a Non-negotiable!
Set your boundaries, sister!
Work on self-acceptance DAILY.
If you loved this episode, be sure to tune in to…
Episode 108: Self Love: The #1 Thing That Transformed My Mindset
If you want more from me, be sure to check out...
Follow me on Instagram: @juliealedbetter | @embraceyourreal | @movementwithjulie
Movement With Julie | App: https://sale.movementwithjulie.com/
Macro Counting Made Simple Online Academy: https://www.macrocountingmadesimple.com/
Website: www.juliealedbetter.com
Get my eBook: FREE Macro Counting Ebook
Amazon Storefront: Julie Ledbetter's Amazon Page
Transcript:
[00:00:00] Hey, hey, beautiful human. Can I steal five minutes of your time? I have something super important to share with you, but I promise I'll be really quick. You're listening to my weekly bonus episode of Embrace Your Real with me, Julie Ledbetter. I'm about to give you a quick tip for building your confidence, honoring your body, and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned. If you're ready to embrace your real let's get it. Let's go. [00:00:31]
Speaker 1: [00:00:31] Hello and welcome back to another bonus episode series question. As women, why do we always put ourselves last? Why is it so easy for us to neglect our own well-being? This is got to change. I get it. Like in the chaos of everyday life, it's easy to neglect our own needs in favor of, like, fulfilling responsibility, meeting deadlines, taking care of others. Whether that is due to a demanding job, you know, your family commitments, or just simply the chaotic nature of the world that we're living in. Many of us find putting ourselves last is just the reality of what our day to day looks like. Like we put our well-being on the backburner, how we're neglecting ourselves. This is ultimately the number one reason why we feel burnt out, why we have a diminished sense of self-worth. And so that's why, in today's episode, I really want to share three things that you need to do to stop neglecting yourself and just start prioritizing yourself. And these things will be a simple reminder to, you know, just start implementing them into your daily life. That will help you to stop neglecting yourself while still being able to obviously take care of your commitments, your family commitments, your day to day commitments. But just stop putting yourself off so much. Before we dive in, I want to share. This super sweet reveal comes from Lydia Bricker. She gave a five star review and said, my mind is blown. I'm shook literally in the gym right now. Listening to the third podcast in a row, friend Julie. Wow. I had no idea what I didn't know. Julie is encouraging, relatable, and really makes you feel like you're not alone and that there's hope for this fitness journey that you're on. Listening to Julie I am just feeling like there's grace for this season of getting in shape. I don't need to hurry along in the way that I have in the past, striving like I have before I can walk into this journey excited and ready, learn and grow, and actually be proud of myself along the way. Way to go Julie! I love this so much. I think that that's so important. And man, that's something I wish I would have learned, like when I was on my journey, is that you can actually enjoy the journey. Like in fact, you should be enjoying the journey. If you're not enjoying the journey, you're going to get to the destination and you're not going to feel the way that you thought you would feel. Trust me. But if you're actually taking time to enjoy the journey to celebrate the little wins, the little things that you have, it's going to be such a game changer in just your overall mindset when it comes to the end game, right? I mean, I say the end game, but like whatever goal it is that you want to accomplish and you'll you'll just feel so much more satisfaction in that. So Lydia, I'm so grateful that this podcast is helping you. And thank you so much for taking time out of your day to send in this review. It really does help so much. So if you could scooch over to Apple Podcasts and Liberating Interview again, they just help us out. Kind of know how the podcast is helping you and then other people who stumble upon the podcast. They oftentimes read the reviews to see you know, what the reviews are like, how this podcast is helping them to see if it's worth their time. So thank you in advance for doing that. It really does help us out so, so much. Okay, so let's dive into the three things you need to do if you've been neglecting your own needs. Number one, you have to make self-care a non-negotiable. And to be clear, when I say self-care, I don't really mean getting your nails done heading to the spa. I mean literally taking care of yourself. It needs to be a non-negotiable and not an option, right? Okay, this means, you know, getting your workout in three times a week, that is not an option. Nourishing your body daily. That is not an option. Drinking enough water that is not an option. Giving yourself the rest when you need it, not an option. Like these are things that are so important for you to feel your best. That is not an option. It's not optional, right? Those are things that you have to fit in. So you have to figure out how you're going to fit those things in. Self-care is oftentimes misunderstood as indulgence or selfishness, but in reality, it's really a fundamental practice for overall well-being, right? Being women, we especially tend to juggle multiple roles, responsibilities. And we often put, you know, there needs above hours and hours last, but neglecting self-care that can and will lead to burnout, decreased productivity, poor mental health. Like why are we sacrificing our health rather than prioritizing our health? When you prioritize your own self-care, you're able to recharge your energy reserves. You're able to reduce your stress levels. You're able to enhance your overall quality of life, which will allow you to lead in showing up better for everyone else in your life. If you don't do it for yourself, do it for your loved ones. Do it because you want to prioritize them in the best capacity that you are in, and the only way that you're going to be able to do that is if you no longer think that this self-care is an option. It's a non-negotiable. And when you shift your mindset to being a non-negotiable, you'll recognize how much better you feel in all the different areas of your life. Right? And I think that it's really important that you get creative to ensure that you have the resources you have the time that you need in order to get those things done. It doesn't have to be this endless to list of, you know, self-care. Here things, but I'm saying the essential things that are going to make you feel your best so that you can show up in your best capacity. Those are things that you know there's always going to be solutions for, and you just have to get creative, whether that's with your significant other, whether that's, you know, asking a friend for help, whether that's telling your work, no, I can't do X, Y, and Z. I have to prioritize, you know, x, Y, and z. It's going to maybe have hard conversations. But I'm telling you, when you allow yourself the opportunity to do the things that are going to make you feel your best, you're going to be able to show up as your best self. Number two set boundaries. Setting boundaries is a critical skill for maintaining your mental health, maintaining healthy relationships, and obviously just overall protecting your overall well-being. As women, I think that we oftentimes face these societal pressures to be accommodating and self-sacrificing, and none of those things are bad. I never want to say that it's bad to be like, accommodating and self-sacrificing, but this can also oftentimes lead to overextending ourselves and neglecting our own needs. But again, setting boundaries isn't about being selfish. It's about advocating for yourself. It's about establishing healthy dynamics in relationships. And so bring your new non-negotiables into mine. And ask yourself, okay, now that I have those new non-negotiables in my mind, what boundaries do I need to place in order to make those non-negotiables happen on a weekly basis, on a monthly basis, on a daily basis? And ask yourself, okay, what's the help that I need? What are the things that I need to have in place? Right? Remember this if someone truly cares about you, they will care about your boundaries. So don't be afraid to set them. Don't be afraid to set boundaries at all. In fact, there was such a good book. It's called boundaries. Shocker. But I believe it's by David Townsend. And, it's just one of those. It's just one of those books that you read one time, and I feel like it just has a profound impact on your life. So if you struggled with boundaries, highly recommend Boundaries by David Townsend. It's a great book. It's a great read. And, just remember that you don't have to do it all by yourself, right? You don't have to place all the pressure on yourself to do it all by yourself. And so just remember that the boundaries that you're placing on yourself that's going to allow you, again, to show up as your best self in your best capacity. And and this will help you and your mental and physical health and the people that are not going to honor those boundaries in the first place. You need to really question and ask yourself, are those people that I really should have in my life in the first place? Like if they're not going to honor these boundaries that I have desired in my mind that I believe I need, are they the are they the right people in my life? And so just just ask yourself that question when it comes to creating boundaries. And lastly, work on self-acceptance daily. So we live in a world that is constantly promoting these unrealistic standards of beauty, of success, of parenting, you name it, whatever aspect it is, we have some unrealistic standard placed on us, and this is why we constantly need to come back to this place of self-acceptance. So whether we believe it or not, in the moment, we need to tell ourselves daily, like I am enough, like I am enough. And when I say I am enough, like that is, I believe personally, this is just my personal conviction that we need to always bring God into that, like I am enough with Christ in me, and Christ gives me strength and I am enough because of him. I am enough because of what he did on the cross like I am enough, and I deserve to, you know, show up and respect myself because of that, because God created me and because I'm a created being by him. And so just remembering that, right. Self-acceptance really begins with self-compassion. And instead of beating yourself up for, you know, not measuring up to society standards, you have to practice that kindness, that understanding towards yourself. And remember that you're 100% is going to look different from day to day. Like acknowledge yourself for the effort that you're putting in day in and day out. And then also remind yourself that you're doing the best you can with what you have that day. And on the daily, we need to pay attention to how we're speaking to ourselves internally. Like, are you constantly criticizing yourself for your abilities, your achievements, your appearances? Like, challenge those negative thoughts by reframing them with a positive and realistic perspective. Like for every self-criticism, try to counter it with a self affirmation. And this is a great practice, at least that I think it was. One of my mentors told me years ago, or maybe I read it. I don't remember where I heard it, but it was really taking 24 hours and it's a 24 hour test and saying, okay, for the next 24 hours, every single thing that comes into my brain, I'm going to acknowledge it and it's going to be like, maybe try and do it on a day that you don't have a ton of things going on because it's after you're actually going to recognize how many things you think of and even a 5 to 10 minute span and really challenging the things that you're thinking. So anything that's negative, you write it down and you actually see it. Because I think oftentimes we have so many thoughts that float through our mind that. We don't actually recognize the depth or the impact, profound impact that they're actually having on our mind and on our heart, because they're just going in and coming out so quickly. But they actually have profound impact on our confidence and just in the way that we present ourselves. So anytime you hear yourself thinking something negative, we actually write it down and read it out loud. Once you read it out loud, then you're going to come up with a counter to that. So a positive affirmation to that and say no, I refuse to believe this because of X, Y, and z, and I choose to believe x, y, and z. I know this sounds crazy, and if one full 24 hour test sounds overwhelming, maybe just say, okay, for the next hour I'm going to do this like, you know, while I wind down for the next hour, I'm going to acknowledge the thoughts that come into my brain. I'm going to actually reframe them by physically writing down what I'm hearing of my negative thought. And then I'm going to write down what my positive thought is, and I'm going to speak it out loud to myself. But I think that this is such a positive and profound challenge that we can do to really allow ourselves to recognize the depth of maybe what we're allowing in, in our brain on a day to day basis, and we don't even recognize it. Because, like I said, so many thoughts come in and out of our brain. But allowing ourselves the opportunity to have the positive affirmation and to reframe the mindset will eventually start to retrain your mind so that the next time that you are thinking something negative, you just automatically your brain says no. What I believe to be true is X, Y, and Z. And whether you believe it or not, in the moment of that affirmation, that positive affirmation or reframing that thought over time, you will start to believe it over time, because it's just a practice. It's a habitual practice, right? And I believe that self-acceptance and really self-affirmation, but not in a way that's like just relying on ourself, but also like inviting God into that process that needs to be a day to day, even hour to hour, sometimes minute to minute practice that we need to do. And there's going to be seasons of our life where we're a lot more negative than we are positive. And then there's going to be seasons of our life that we're like, surprisingly more positive than we are negative. And so just recognizing in those times that you are more negative than you are positive, asking God to come in, at least for me, like I have a, you know, a relationship with God. And I believe God wants to be a part of every single part of our thought process in our life. So asking him, inviting him into those those moments where you feel like, man, I just am so negative right now. God, please fill me with your truth. God, please fill me with your promise and and lead me to Scripture that I can meditate on and lead me to your word that I can, marinate in and allow my soul to just feel rest and feel peace. And again, whether this is a 24 hour test, it's a it's an hour test. Even if you set an alarm on your phone and say, okay, today, you know, for the next 30 minutes, I'm going to be alone, I'm going to be evaluating my thoughts. I know it sounds so woowoo, but I think that we allow so many things into our brain that we don't recognize have such a deep, profound impact. And I want you to lay your head on that pillow at night and be like, I was kind to myself today, or at the very least, I am giving myself grace, and I am trying my hardest to think positive things about myself and to counteract all of the negative things that I'm thinking about. Like, I want that for you, because the more that you practice that, the more you'll just come to realize that it actually becomes like a habit. And when it becomes a habit, man, that's a beautiful thing that, you know, anytime something negative comes into your brain, you immediately have the habitual nature of saying, no, I refuse to believe that, and I choose to believe this truth instead. So I hope that that, you know, kind of gives you just, a quick action item. If you're struggling with negativity or negative thoughts, whether that's surrounding a certain situation or just in general, like maybe you're just confidence in general, like something that you're struggling with, or maybe it's a season of life that you're in. You're maybe you're entering into a new season with a different role that you've never played in your life, and you just have all these negative thoughts. I want to encourage you to try those practices. So let me quickly recap the three things that you need to focus on. If you've been struggling to prioritize yourself. Number one, make self-care a non-negotiable. Number two, set your boundaries. And number three, work on self-acceptance daily. If you love this episode, I know you'll also love episode 108 Self-love. The number one thing that transformed my mindset. I will go ahead and link that in the show notes below, but I hope that you found this episode helpful. I hope that it was just the real talk that you needed to kind of push you or nudge you in the direction of just prioritizing yourself. Remember, we prioritize ourselves, become the best version of ourselves so that we can serve others in our best capacity. That's always the end goal. Like, our goal on this earth is to serve others, and if we can serve others in our best capacity. That is ultimately what we should be striving for. And the best way to do that is by not neglecting yourself and not neglecting the basic needs that you. You need to feel your best and to be your best. Because at the end of the day, at the end of your life, remember this. You consistently, habitually neglect yourself. You're not going to be able to show up for your family members at the end of your life, the way that you want to. I want you to have a strong, vibrant life, whether that's in your 20s, that's in your 30s, 40s, 50, 60, 70, whatever age bracket you're in, I want you to feel your best self so that you can serve others in your best capacity. Okay? Capiche? All right, I love you. That's all that I have for today's episode. I will talk to you in the next one. [00:16:04][932.9]
[932.8][00:16:08] All right, sister, that's all I got for you today. But I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you are not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so. Julie A Ledbetter. Yes, it's with an A in the middle for that daily post workout real talk, healthy tips and tricks, and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing, be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode. Thank you so much for joining me. It means the absolute world, and I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface. So go out there and embrace it real because you're worth it. [00:17:02][0.0]