10 Ways to Build the Life You Actually Want (Part 2)
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It can feel a little impossible to build the life that you want, but what people fail to realize is that we all have what it takes to turn our life around.
That’s why, I am back with the second part of the Building the Life You Actually Want series. Tune in to this episode of the Embrace Your Real podcast as I give you actionable tips that you can use towards building the life you actually want.
What I discuss:
Put yourself out there by networking…
Don’t be afraid to ask for help…
Be adaptable…
Visualize your future…
Commit to the long game…
If you love this episode, you’ll also love…
Episode 352 - 10 Ways to Build the Life You Actually Want (Part 1)
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Transcript:
Speaker 1: [00:00:00] Hey. Hey, beautiful human. Can I steal 5 minutes of your time? I have something super important to share with you, but I promise I'll be really quick. You're listening to my weekly bonus episode of Embrace Your Real with Me, Julie Ledbetter. I'm about to give you a quick tip for building your confidence, honoring your body, and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned. If you're ready to embrace a real. Let's get it. Let's go. [00:00:22][22.7]
[00:00:30] Hello and welcome back to another bonus episode. Are you tired of feeling like life is slipping through your fingers? You're just along for the ride. Are you tired of everyone else living these magical lives where you feel like you're stuck in your life and you just, like, are frustrated, You feel stuck and you just feel like you're in this constant cycle that is never ending. I have great news. You are in control of how you structure your life, of how you build your life. If you truly desire that, it's time that you take control, that you kind of steer yourself towards the life that you've always dreamt of living or back on track. Maybe you were there once, but then something happened and now you're feeling very derailed. [00:01:13][43.2]
[00:01:14] Today I want to share part one of a two part episode series Ten Practical Steps to help you create a life that is fulfilling and full of possibilities. So over this two part series, that's what we're going to be sharing today is going to be one through five. And then I'm going to release part two, which is going to be the remaining five. And I just want you to listen up. I want you to remember that you do have power. I think oftentimes we believe the lie that we don't have any power in our life. And I don't know about you, but that's very discouraging. It's something that I wish that I would have learned years ago because it would have saved me so much time in sulking and misery and wasting energy. Honestly, just wasting energy thinking, oh, you know, that happens to so-and-so, but that could never happen to me. And it wasn't until I said, you know, I have the opportunity to change my situation. You know, we don't always have the power to change everything that we're going through, but we do have the power of how we look at things. We do have the power to make different decisions based on where you're at and where you want to be. So that's exactly what we're going to be talking about in this two part series. I really hope you join us for both parts. [00:02:37][82.4]
[00:02:37] Before we dive in, though, I want to share this review. It comes from she's laughin, but laughing is l.a. FFI and very, very witty. I love this. This came from apple podcasts. She gave a five star review and said great learning tool. After finding this podcast by Julie using workouts on pinterest, I have learned so much. I am so grateful that she puts this content out there. So many young people like myself can learn from her about life. I also love that she incorporates her faith into this podcast, a very refreshing thing for all of the secular fitness voices out there. [00:03:09][32.3]
[00:03:10] I love this so much. Oh my goodness. So, so much. This is exactly why I do what I do. I wish I would have had this resource honestly, back in, you know, high school age, college. I wasted a decade of my life, you guys. And I don't regret it because it is exactly place me to where I am today. And I believe that God uses this and he uses everybody's story for his purpose. But man, I think it would have just sped things up a little bit. So I'm really so thankful that you not only found my workouts on Pinterest, Hey, on Pinterest, I love you guys, but also that you're finding this podcast helpful. So thank you for taking time out of your day to send in this review. It really does help not only us and our team out know how this podcast is helping you, but it also helps other people who stumble upon the podcast and say, Is this podcast something that's, you know, worth my time? Because I know our time is very, very valuable today. And so the fact that you guys take time out of your day to not only see an interview, but also tune into the podcast is something I never want to take for granted. I'm so grateful for this community, so thank you in advance. If you do take 30 seconds out of your day to send an interview, it would really help us out. But let's dive in to part one of the two part series, Ten Ways to Build the Life That You Actually Want. [00:04:25][74.5]
[00:04:25] Number one, you've got to get very, very clear on what you actually want. So many people complain about living this very unfulfilled life, but they've never actually taken the time to figure out what would a fulfilled life look like for me. How can you live the life that you actually want if you don't even know what that life looks like for you? You need to take the time to define what that life is and what it involves. If you can't imagine it, how are you supposed to follow through on the steps to start to create it? You've got to answer these questions like What does it look like? How does it feel? What are you doing? Where are you? Who are you with? Who are you surrounded by? What have you achieved? All of these things, the more vivid and specific that you can get with this vision, the better. It's like really setting your GPS coordinates to your dream destination. And of course, life's going to happen. Of course things are going to happen along the way. And so I think having this clear vision, but also having this flexible approach and I call it flexible. Faith like, All right, Lord, this is what I want to do. But I know ultimately that you were in control. And I know ultimately that you know what's best for me. So I'm going to take the steps that I know, where I think I know that I need to take to get there. But you derail me as you see fit. And I know that this is a scary place to be. But I have to tell you that every single time I've done that, I've never been steered in the wrong direction, because I personally believe that every single situation that we encounter has a purpose behind it. We might not know that purpose in this lifetime, but I genuinely believe that we will one day recognize and understand. Oh, that's why I went through that. Oh, or, you know, it was a sucky thing to go through. And I don't wish that upon anybody else but the character that I built or the knowledge that I built or the faith that I built during that time was cultivated. Like there's so many things. And so you've got to get crystal clear on what you actually want. [00:06:23][118.5]
[00:06:24] Number two, you've got to set milestones for yourself. Some people already have this figured out. They know exactly what they want. They want their life to look like, but they really haven't made any plans for executing on it. Like, dreaming is wonderful, but taking action is really where the magic happens, right? You've got to take small steps towards your goal every day. So really start with this big picture and then break it down into smaller, more achievable milestones. Because everything that was built, that's great. It wasn't built overnight. It might look like it was built overnight. We live in this Amazon prime world where we say like, Oh my gosh, well, they just went from 0 to 1000000 so fast and followers or whatever it is. And yet we don't know. We don't know their life. We don't know how long they've been working at this. We don't know what their life path looked like. And so we have to have the discernment to say, okay, you know, I'm going to set this big picture goal, but I'm also going to break it down. And it's the same thing with fitness goals, right? I always say like, what's your big outcome? And then kind of back step and say, okay, what are the different small milestones that are going to be in between from A to D? You got to go A to B, B to C, C, D, D, and really break down those things. So what do you need to do this month? What about next month? What about the next six months? And then how are you going to execute on this? Make sure that you not only have a plan for what you need to achieve, but also plan for how you're going to execute it. Execution is really where most people fail. They have this great intention, whether it's have this great intention to work out regularly, have this great intention to properly feel my body. But the execution is where they really fail. And oftentimes it's because they only have the big picture set up in their mind and they don't recognize the small steps that it takes to get there. And then they also don't recognize that those small steps are not going to be perfect steps. Those small steps are going to have failure. They're going to have challenges, they're going to have derailment. But you have to recognize that those small steps are actually what takes you from A to D. [00:08:26][122.1]
[00:08:26] Number three. They really embrace the power of positive thinking. Now, I know that sounds cheesy, but really hear me out like it is so, so vital to be your biggest cheerleader. I cannot stress this enough. Like, you have to be your biggest cheerleader. You have to respond with. Yes, I can. I will. I'll figure it out. And for me personally, again, I'm a faith believer. I believe that God will direct my steps. I'm going to I'm going to go in a direction, but I pray that he directs my steps or redirects my steps. But I just say, you know, on a daily basis, I say, Lord, thank you for the breath in my lungs. Thank you that I have the opportunity to do X, Y, and Z, and I'm going to choose to look at this through the lens of gratitude. I talk about gratitude all of the time, but you I really believe that this this positive thinking starts with this attitude of gratitude. I know that is such an over cliche saying, but it's so true and there's so much scientific research to back that up, that having this gratitude mindset, having this attitude of gratitude really does set you up in terms of looking at life through a totally different lens. And I believe that the difference between a person that is doing something and not doing something is really a belief and a belief in themselves and the belief so much so that they execute on what they believe. So if you really want to start living a different life, you have to believe that and you have to take the steps necessary to do so. Otherwise you're just going to live your life envious of other people for the rest of your life. And that is no good. And that is only going to waste so much energy and precious time. We are not promised tomorrow. I know that's scary, but we're not. We're not promised tomorrow. We're not promised next week. We're not promised next year. And so I need you to take each day in with this attitude of gratitude. And trust me when I say it will. Totally change the lens in which you view life. Which leads me to my next point of number four developing a growth mindset. [00:10:33][126.4]
[00:10:33] Really the best way to embrace this power of positive thinking and having this positive lens in terms of just looking at your life is believing that you are capable of learning and adopting the skills that you need to build the life that you want. Adopting this growth mindset is about believing in your capacity to learn and grow. God has given us this ability, this acute ability to be able to learn and retain things, and it is so freaking awesome. Like the fact that we have so many resources at our fingertips in this day and age, like I always say. Like we were born in such a time as this. Like God knew that we were not born in 1970. We shouldn't, you know, we were not born into like the life of 1970. Maybe you were born in 1970, but we're not living through the 1970s or the 1980s. The 1980s. Like, yes, you may have lived through that, but right now we're living in 2023. We have YouTube, we have podcasts, we have books, we have audio books. We have literally all of these things that will allow us to grow in our mindset so that we can approach life with this curious mind, to embrace new experiences that we learn from, to adopt new habits, things that you thought you never would would be able to be capable of doing, like you're able to do. It is amazing. So I want to encourage you to try to learn something new every single day and really challenge yourself. This is one thing you guys have probably heard about the 75 hard. I've not personally done the whole 75 hard. I know that there's a lot of conflicting things about it. One thing that I do think that is so beneficial and I'm so grateful that this is a part of 75, how so many people have done it and it's really gone viral is these ten pages of reading. I mean, like I can't tell you and I will be the first to say I'm not naturally a reader. Like if you're looking at the reader in the household, that is Joshua, he can crash a book in literally like 2 hours, like he goes through a stack of books in a matter of 1 to 2 weeks, and it is so inspiring. I just have never been that type of person. But what's cool is that when you really approach life with this growth mindset, you're able to adopt new habits, you're able to challenge yourself and really, you know, reading awe and whether it's reading like you're actually reading or you're listening to a book or whatever it is, it's a habit you got to get into the habit of doing. It's the same thing of like flossing. I know flossing. This was me. I really struggled with the habit of flossing and I just went to the dentist and I had two cavities again after I hadn't had cavities for like four years, but I haven't flossed in those four years. And the difference between me and Joshua is that he floss is like 1 to 2 times a day. He is like perfect teeth. And I was like, you know, I know I always talk about flossing, but I just need to get into the habit of it. And so I developed like I talk about habit stacking a lot. I got that. I believe that came from James clear anatomic habits, but habit stacking, it's the same thing with reading or adopting this growth mindset, like challenging yourself to like 10 to 15 minutes a day of just trying to grow in some way, shape or form in your mind. So whether this is reading, whether this is listening to a podcast, doing something that's challenging I think is so vital to growing and developing and character and just expanding your knowledge is it's amazing. So that is definitely one thing that is so, so vital to make sure you're following through on when you're building the life that you actually want. [00:14:02][208.9]
[00:14:02] And lastly, number five, in today's episode, part one, remember, part two will be released next week, but realizing that feedback is your best friend, feedback is your best friend. It can really be a game changer when working towards building the life that you wanted. Like really, instead of viewing feedback as criticism or personal attack, really embrace that as a gift that can propel you forward. So being open to this feedback that you are receiving from a person and I have to put a disclaimer here, we will hear criticism all the time and we'll hear feedback all the time. And I think this really comes with a discerning mind and in discerning heart and asking yourself like, is this a person that I trust? Is this a person, you know, that I want to allow speak into my life? And sometimes the answer is no to that. And so in that case, if I get criticism from somebody that I don't know or I'm not, you know, you know, allowed them really to speak into my life, but yet they just kind of force force their way into that role, I'll say, is there any truth to this? And I'll really try to be honest, like, is there any sort of truth to this criticism or feedback? And if the answer is no, then I'll, you know, genuinely know, then I will put it aside. If if I look at that criticism and say, you know, there is maybe a little bit of this, I really just try to pick it apart and say like, is there truth to this? Because I believe that criticism can really be. Our biggest asset when wanting to grow and being open to feedback is really important. Demonstrating this willingness to learn and evolve really goes back to having that growth mindset, which is essential for reaching your potential. And remember that feedback most of the time. Sometimes it is meant to tear you down, but most of the time it's not meant to turn you down. It's it should present the opportunity to build you up, build you up stronger, whether it's in knowledge, whether it's in skills or whatever it is. I think that it can offer a fresh perspective and help you to identify blind spots or areas that you can refine your skills. But embracing feedback with gratitude and approach it with an open mind are my two keys in terms of that. So, so important. Also really just actively seeking feedback if you haven't been getting a lot of feedback from people but you want to start getting feedback, maybe just ask them. Maybe just say like, Hey, I really value you. I value the role that you play in my life and I just want some feedback like in specific areas of my life and maybe like kind of guide them in that. Like where do you see I am in this way or what do you see in this way? Or do you see any, you know, things that maybe I don't see in myself in this specific area of my life and just having that open and honest and vulnerable conversation can really it can open up so many amazing things. But realizing again, going back to feedback is and can be your best friend. [00:16:52][169.8]
[00:16:53] So there you have it. Those are the first five tips for building the life that you want. Let me quickly recap what I talked about today. Number one, getting clear on what you actually want. Number two, setting milestones for yourself. Number three, embracing the power of positive thinking. Remember, having that attitude of gratitude really does change the lens in which you see things on a daily basis. Number four, developing a growth mindset. And number five, realizing that feedback is and can be your best friend. Now, if you love this episode, I know you also love episode 2247 Ways to Deal with Criticism and also Episode 156 five Steps to aligning your actions with your goals. I will link both of those things in the show notes that you can easily go tune in to those, but stay tuned for part two. I hope that this was helpful. I hope that this gave you some value, this encouragement, empowerment in some way, shape or form. If you have a friend or coworker or someone in your life that you feel like would really benefit from this specific episode. I just ask that you share it out with them. You can copy the link and send it to them in a text message. You can also screenshot this and post it up on your story. I always love connecting with you guys. Be sure to tag us so that we can connect with you in the dreams. I love you so dang much. I mean it and I'll talk to you in the next one. [00:18:06][74.0]
[00:18:06] All right, sister. That's all I got for you today. But I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you are not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so. Julie. A Ledbetter. Yes, It's within in the middle for that daily post-workout real talk, healthy tips and tricks and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode. Thank you so much for joining me. It means the absolute world. And I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface. So go out there and embrace your real because you're worth it. [00:19:04]