To the Woman Obsessing About What Her Body Looks Like…
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Society has ingrained in us the idea that perfection lies in conforming to a specific appearance and standard. And because of this, countless women have found themselves struggling with their identity and body image.
For some, not a day goes by without scrutinizing themselves in the mirror and hating themselves for not looking a certain way, or fitting on a certain pant-size, or feeling fat in all their clothes. They constantly feel uncomfortable and dissatisfied with their appearance. Others become fixated on their weight loss journey, allowing it to dominate their thoughts, and developing a profound self-disdain for failing to shed those extra pounds.
This episode of Embrace Your Real podcast is for those women.
Through this episode, my hope is to guide you in reframing your mindset so that you can embrace your life to the fullest without allowing your negative body image to consume you.
Links Mentioned in the Episode:
Episode 192 - The Science Behind A Gratitude Practice
Episode 270 - 7 Things That Will Boost Your Self Esteem
If you want more from me, be sure to check out...
Instagram: @embraceyourreal | @movementwithjulie
Movement With Julie | App: https://sale.movementwithjulie.com/
Macro Counting Made Simple: https://www.macrocountingmadesimple.com/
Website: www.juliealedbetter.com
Free e-book: www.juliealedbetter.com/free-ebook
Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-6bda1ca8?ref=cm_sw_em_r_inf_pub_influencer-6bda1ca8_dp_DgsIam9salgfi
Transcript:
Hey. Hey, beautiful human. Can I steal 5 minutes of your time? I have something super important to share with you, but I promise I'll be really quick. You're listening to my weekly bonus episode of Embrace Your Real with me, Julie Ledbetter. I'm about to give you a quick tip for building your confidence, honoring your body, and unconditionally loving your authentic self. Stay tuned. If you're ready to embrace a real. Let's get it. Let's go.
Hello and welcome back to another bonus episode. If you have been obsessing about what you look like, this episode is for you. This episode is for the woman who cried this morning because she felt fat in her clothes. This episode is for the woman who thinks that she's only worthy if she fits into a certain pant size. This episode is for the woman who allows her weight loss journey to consume every single thought inside her head. This episode is for the woman who thinks that she cannot be happy until she loses X amount of weight or fits in X pant size or wears x, Y, and Z. My hope and prayer for this episode is to help you reframe your mindset so that you can start to enjoy your life to the fullest without allowing your negative body image to consume you.
But before we dive in, I wanted to share this review. It comes from Sierra Loves Cats, Love that screen name. She gave a five star review and said:
Wonderful podcasts. I am 14 years old and my mother introduced me to this podcast because she really liked it. The first episode I listened to was seven Positive Affirmations and I have been a fan ever since. I used to hate my nightly chores, making my lunch, packing my bag, but instead listening to your podcast has now made it more enjoyable. Thank you for creating such an uplifting podcast.
Oh my gosh, I love this so much. This is You are exact Sierra. I'm assuming your name is Sierra because it's Sierra loves cats. You are the reason why I created this podcast. I wanted to speak to women, young and old, and remind them that they are incredible. Give them little nuggets of education so that they can feel empowered in their body, in their mind with their nutrition, with their movement. And so I am first and foremost, I want to say thank you to your mom, and I am so proud of you at 14 years old. You are tuning in, man.
You are honestly, the reason why I created this because I wasted a decade of my life from honestly age 14 to about 24, where I was consumed with all these things. I was consumed with trying to fit in the smallest pant size. I was consumed with having this negative look on my body and health and fitness in general, and just having such a negative relationship with it. And my hope and my prayer is that every single episode leaves you either feeling encouraged, empowered or educated. And so thank you, Sierra, for tuning in. Thank you to your mom for introducing you to the podcast.
Hey, if you haven't already rated and reviewed the podcast over on Apple Podcasts, it would mean the absolute world to me. If you took one minute and head over there, type in Embrace your L first, make sure you're subscribed so that you never miss an episode. We launched them on Monday and Thursday. So to kick off your week and then to kind of close out your week with some real talk and so that way you never miss an episode. It's downloaded directly to your phone 100% free. And also if you could leave rating interview, that would really help us out. It just helps not only our team know kind of what is helping you, what episodes are helping you in general. And also it helps people who stumble upon the podcast if they're, you know, browsing through the charts or they see, you know, the podcast under another podcast, they click on it. People tend to look at the reviews to see if it's something that they want to tune into. So thank you in advance for doing that.
Okay, so here is some real talk that I want to share with you. And if you only get one thing out of today's episode, I want you to take this away. Your appearance is not your identity. Let me repeat that again. Your appearance is not your identity. You are not only your body, you are you as a person, not your body. You are so much more than what you look like on the outside. Other people see that and it's time for you to see that as well. I think it's so easy to get caught up in the way that we look, especially in a world that puts so much emphasis on our external appearance. But let's be real. We are bombarded with images of perfect bodies, faces, perfect angles, and of course, it's going to be natural for us to not feel like we measure up. We are comparing our behind the scenes to someone else's highlight reel. How can we measure up when most images or videos are photoshopped or edited?
To be honest, if we measure up and if we go to those extreme lengths, we're going to go to very unhealthy measures to get there. And this is why we need to let go of the idea of looking perfect as our goal identity and instead embrace what our true identity is. Right? Your identity. First and foremost, I am a Christian. I'm a faith believer. I believe that our identity, we are to mirror Christ and we are Christ's beautiful creations that He has. So. Wonderfully and beautifully designed. But what is also included in our identity is our values, our beliefs, our personality, our experiences. It's this complex and unique combination of all these things that really make you who you are. And so while yes, your appearance might be part of that, it's only one small piece of the puzzle. I think it's so easy to fall into the trap that thinking if we just looked a certain way, we'd be happier, we'd be more successful.
But the truth of the matter is that appearance does not and will never equate to happiness or success. It is one small factor in such a larger equation. Focusing too much on your appearance can actually be harmful to your mental health. It can lead you to so much unnecessary negative self-talk comparison and a very unhealthy relationship with your body. This can have a ripple effect on other areas of your life, including your relationships, your work, and overall your well-being. So how do we shift our focus away from appearance and towards our true identity?
Well, I first think that it starts with recognizing that appearance is not the most important thing about us. We can take steps to focus on the things that truly matter, like our values and our passion. So maybe that's your family or your kids. Maybe that's God, the church, the community that you are involved in. Maybe that's spending time in nature. Maybe that's career. Maybe that's your hobby. Maybe that's traveling. Figure out what that is for you. What are your values and what are your passions? If you're unsure of what these are, I want to challenge you to discover it.
It's going to take time because once you find your value, once you find your passions, you actually realize how much more and more important other things are other than your body size. You realize that that actually doesn't matter. You can focus on your values and passions regardless of your pant size, and that's what makes it so beautiful. Of course, I will always tell you to honor your body with movement and nourish your body with what it needs. But it doesn't need to be, and it should not be your sole focus. And one other way that you can really focus on your values and your passions is to spend time engaging in activities that bring us true joy and fulfillment.
So whether this is painting, this could be playing sports, volunteering. Find things that we love to do and help us feel more connected to our truer selves. When we focus on what we love, we're less likely to get caught up in appearance based comparisons and negative self-talk. Another way to shift our focus is to practice gratitude seriously. This has absolutely 100% changed my life.
When we take time to appreciate the things that we have in our life, we are so less likely to get caught up in things that we don't have, including this perfect appearance. Practicing gratitude can help us shift our mindset and appreciate all of the amazing things about ourselves that really have nothing to do with appearance themselves. I personally have a gratitude list every single day, and I try my hardest to get seven things from the previous day or what I'm currently experiencing in the moment that I'm grateful for. And it's big and small. Oftentimes they're small little things, like I'm grateful for the fuzzy socks that I have. I'm grateful for the fuzzy blanket that I have, or I'm thankful for this delicious drink that I'm having, whatever it is, like small things and then also large things. God, I am thankful. I am so thankful for my health. I'm so thankful for my basic and advanced utility of movement. Those are things that are on my gratitude list every single day that really don't have anything to do with my physical appearance. There are things and people that I have in my life that I'm grateful for experience that I had, that I'm grateful for. And overall, just basic functioning things that like my organs are working and my lungs are working and I'm able to see and I'm able to hear and I'm able to do all of these things, things that we so easily take for granted that really genuinely have nothing to do with your pants size or how much weight you're losing or whatever X goal that you are hyper fixating on that is negatively impacting your mindset.
All in all, I just want to remind you that your appearance is not your identity, your true identity. Again, first and foremost, I'm a faith believing Christian. I believe our identity is found in God. I believe that our confidence should be found in Him and who he says we are. But it also includes your values, your beliefs, your passions. And while, yes, it's natural for us to want to look our best, focusing too much on appearance can be harmful to our mental health. Instead, I really want to encourage you to focus on things that truly matter and build a strong sense of self-worth that is not tied to your external appearance. If you love this episode, I know you also love Episode 270 - 7 Things That Will Boost Your Self Esteem. I will link that in the show notes below. And then I also have another episode. The number in particular is not coming to mind, but I will link to it in the show notes and it's talking all about the science of gratitude and how that can change your overall mindset. How there has been studies that have been shown that having a grateful mind and a grateful heart can actually change physiologically things in your body, which is incredible. So I will link that episode as well in the show notes below.
But that is all that I have for today's bonus episode. I hope that this gave you some encouragement. I hope that this gave you some inspiration, maybe the pep talk that you needed. I want you to know that you are so beautifully and wonderfully made. I want you to know that you have so much going for you that has nothing to do with your external appearance. God has a plan for you. Whether you are living that out and you are feeling so fulfilled or you are in a season of your life where you're like, I don't know what is next. I feel like I'm failing. Or I just went through a season of complete failure and now I'm trying to rebuild. I want you to know that we go through these mountaintops and these valley lows so that we can grow in our character. And also, I want you to know that you bring value to this world so far beyond what you might know and what you might comprehend right now. And I want you to trust that. I want you to know that people love you for so many other things other than your physical appearance. All right. I love you so dang much, sister. I mean it. And I'll talk to you in the next time.
All right, sister. That's all I got for you today. But I have two things that I need you to do. First thing, if you are not already following me on the gram, be sure to do so. Julie. A Ledbetter. Yes. It's with an A in the middle for that daily post about real talk, healthy tips and tricks and honest accountability to keep your mind and heart in check. The second thing be sure to subscribe to Apple Podcasts to never miss an episode. Thank you so much for joining me and means The Absolute World. And I'm going to leave you with one last thought. The most beautiful women that I have met in my life are the ones who are completely confident and secure in being authentically themselves. Remember that beauty goes so much deeper than the surface. So go out there and embrace the real because you're worth it.